Z Baby Quest

It's 2am and I'm laying here awake feeling nauseous and battling a severe headache. I cried myself to sleep around 9pm after taking a Valium. Now I'm awake with a hangover. My body is so sensitive to any kind of drug.....I can't take anything without feeling sick. So now I'm sandwiched in bed by Minnie and Mylo and Dan is snoring away in the guest room. Go figure... Earlier today I got a phone call from the pharmacy saying that they couldn't ship my two stimulating meds, the most important ones for the cycle, because Aetna denied my claim. Up until now, I was told everything was covered including all prescription meds. I even had proof of this in writing. So after several phone calls and a lot of yelling, arguing and waiting on hold, I was defeated. In order to get the meds needed for this round of IVF, I need to cough up $3,500. You'd think I be used to the anger and disappointment (Dan certainly is and it doesn't seem to faze him at all anymore). Dan knows me and relies a lot on me to fix things and find a new way out of each mess we encounter. I don't blame him or get mad that this is the case.....it's just how we are wired. I'm a problem solver and he's the support system. So here we go again.....we have to figure out a way to find Menopur and Bravelle. We have to look for people that have meds left over from their cycle, or find a scholarship program; something my brain can't come up with right now. This is so exhausting and miserable. I never knew this would be so hard. The IVF itself is a breeze.....So many people talk about enduring 5,6 and 7 cycles......but they never talk about what happens during those cycles....all the back and forth with insurance and doctors and nurses and care coordinators, the paperwork and authorizations and copays! It's INSANE. I really feel I'm losing my mind. I have to stop typing now. My eyes are almost swollen shut from crying. I have to stop obsessing and try to sleep. I'll keep you posted on what's next.